I’ve just spent seven days on a yoga/hiking retreat. It was the first time I had traveled without a friend or my family since 1998. As a mother, it can be hard to get away and to find a way to do it in a mostly guilt-free way. My parents play a hugely active role in my children’s lives, making trips like this more doable for me & to them I owe a huge debt of gratitude.
Most every day we started at 6am with warm tea (it drops to freezing at night), journaling or meditation, a yoga class – with the Andes in view. We ate delicious vegetarian meals, and spent all but 2-3 hrs a day exploring the Sacred Valley or the Cloud Forest in Peru.
We hiked, we explored Pisac & Ollantaytambo (ancient Inca cities), discovered the salt mines (still collectively & locally owned), producing pink Peruvian salt. We bought a picnic lunch at Urubamba market, bargained for alpaca ponchos & scarves, had our chakras re-aligned with a glass bowl ceremony, shared a hot and for me incredibly difficult sweat-lodge experience. We delighted in an amazing tour of the cloud-encased Machu Picchu.
We were a group of predominantly single, strong, independent women who spend most of our lives being leaders – banker, writer, accountant, lawyer, scientist, executive chef, therapist, entrepreneurs etc.
We spend most of our lives organizing, delegating, managing and taking charge of our own time. Yet, here we were – being lead – in yoga classes by Gracy, to the abundant table by Ananda, around the sites or onto the dance floor by Mallku.
There is something very peaceful about not having to make the myriad decisions we usually make every day. My decisions this week ranged from purple or black sports bra, tomato or avocado (or both) on my freshly baked bread, and is $3 a good deal for those knitted leg warmers (yes!).
A weight is lifted and a sense of peace and mental freedom is gained from not being in control. I found that I had more space to think and to talk and make new friendships when I wasn’t having to deal with my usual plethora of daily decisions.
The thing that was most rewarding to me was when I reviewed the comment sheet that we all compiled for each other on the last day.
Tamsin:
Your self-confidence and strength shine.You are beautiful inside and out. Your sense of adventure & openness are inspiring.Your energy and sense of self are inspiring.The wild heart. Thank you for being who you are.You have THE best energy and a really beautiful perspective on life.I find you courageous for figuring out how you want to live your life and making the change happen.Your knowledge is intoxicating and your laugh too.So much fun and light in you.You are a mad/sexy/strong/fascinating/intelligent woman! I love your spirit, your laugh, your wildness, and your deep love for others, especially your children. A true role model.Best butt award! You are so amazing and such an admirable mom!Love you energy and dance moves.Light shines brighter once it knows true darkness. Your light is intoxicating. Thank you for your spirit.
The first time I read these, I didn’t really take them in – it didn’t quite feel real, or that these could really be about me.
The second time I read these, I cried. Yes – I’m not broken, I thought. These last few years have dented me, but not fundamentally. I can still shine! As Nietzsche said and has been much paraphrased in the popular lexicon “That which doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger.”
The third time I read these I thought – I hope my children and close friends and family see these attributes in me too. I had never met any of these people before and these compliments made me so happy: I felt really seen.
So, I’m inspired to go on retreat again. This kind of retreat worked for me: exploring new places, yoga and meditation, great food and the chance to meet fabulous people!
I’m also inspired to try and find ‘retreat’ in my daily life. How to do this, I wonder? Remove some of the daily decisions and automate as much as possible. This is inherently unappealing to Gemini-Vata types like me! But, from this experience, I’m certain that reducing my decisions yields more mental space. So, limiting my daily choices around food, bed times, wake times, exercise times will give me some of that ‘retreat’ in a daily way.
In gratitude: Gracy, Ananda, Mallku, Agnes, Amy, Brant, Christina,
Desiree, Erin, Katy, Linny, Maggie, Maria, Rebecca, Sarah & Peru!
Copyright Tamsin Astor, YogaBrained LLC, 2015.